I know what you’re thinking: Where on earth has Meg disappeared to?
Well, I’ve been in Toledo, where I met a ton of great readers (and some Lefty Librarians)!
Many thanks to everyone who showed up to see me (and special thanks to Amelia, Elizabeth, and Sara who brought me a ton of gluten-free goodies, as well as a beautiful poster that I could tell they’d worked on really hard!), and of course to everyone who had a hand in putting on such a special event!
Next week I’m off to Memphis for my June 19th events, where, if my turn-out(s) are even half as big (and as nice) as in Toledo, I’ll be hugely pleased!
I know this sounds crazy given how many books I’ve written, but I can’t help that when I told my mom when I was in the eleventh grade that I wanted to be a writer, she made me take typing. Now I can type 80 words a minute. Mom was afraid, thanks to my seriously bad Math SAT scores, that she’d have to support me forever! She figured at least if I could type I’d be able to get a job somewhere other than Rax Roast Beef, where I did work for a short while before quitting over how fast they made me do everything (not to mention the green polyester pants they made me wear).
Whoa, Rax has a Myspace! Check it out! That one guy’s comments are hilarious. Actually, I think I used to work with him…Oh, no, wait, he was 2 years old when I worked at Rax. Never mind.
But I mean, in every other way except writing, I’m slooooooow (while working at Rax, they were always yelling at me to be faster, especially while putting that cheesy stuff on the baked potatoes for the people in the drive-thru. Dude, putting that cheesy stuff on the potatoes is an art. You cannot hurry it. My manager Deb just could not understand that. Deb and I had serious issues with each other).
For instance, I ride a bike everywhere now. And even though I own a Blackberry, I don’t know how it works, except to make calls. I have never written or received an email on my Blackberry. Why do I own one? Because T-Mobile automatically upgraded me to one, and I thought, “Cool! I’ll be like a lady business executive!”
But I can’t figure out how my Blackberry works. But I like it, because it’s pretty.
And while I haven’t given up on my dream of one day owning a driver’s license, I live on a two mile by four mile island. Where am I going to go if I DO get a license? Into the ocean?
And now that my hometown of Bloomington, Indiana, where I frequently visit, is underwater, I’m probably better off getting a kayak anyway. Check out what happened there earlier this week:
White water rapids outside the student union!
Bloomington’s main drag, Kirkwood, outside Nick’s English Hut, my favorite place to get cheese dip and breadsticks (which I am no longer allowed to have anyway thanks to celiac disease. But I could just eat the cheese dip with fries, a recipe I made up while working at Rax).
Everyone gazing in wonder at the flood on Kirkwood (I saw soooo many movies at the Von Lee theater, which is now, sadly, a noodle shop. Anyway, see those gates, where the bus is, way in the background? Those are the Sample Gates, on which someone–NOT ME–spray painted in 1987 Bobby Knight is Scum From Hell. This incident was the inspiration for my book Pants on Fire, or Tommy Sullivan is a Freak, as it is known in the UK. But I will have you know I was FALSELY ACCUSED).
Of course people couldn’t help but wonder if this was all because my friend Sophia’s water broke this past weekend in Bloomington, when she gave birth to a little baby boy named Finn.
But honestly, I don’t think that had anything to do with it. It was all Mother Nature’s doing.
Oh, and here’s a video I made back when I was still allowed to eat cupcakes. Mmmmm, cupcakes, I wish I could eat twenty of them RIGHT NOW: