Oh My Blog
For the two people who read this who fell asleep before the Oscars were over, I will now provide a recap:
First Gem started out sitting on my lap. Then she moved to He Who Shall Not Be Named In This Blog’s Lap. Then she moved to our houseguest’s lap. But our houseguest had an unfair advantage, because she was wearing jeans, and Gem cannot resist any lap clad in denim! So wrong!
Oh, right! The Oscars.
Since all that matters is what anybody wore anyway, here are the Fuglies to fill you in. My favorite part was, of course, when Gary Busey attacked Ryan Seacrest and Jennifer Garner on the red carpet before the whole thing even started.
I don’t know why Jennifer looked so scared, just a few nights ago I saw her stab a man in the you-know-what in The Kingdom. Surely she could handle Gary Busey!
And where was Ben Affleck? Does anyone know? Well, if you saw Jimmy Kimmel later, he reveals all. Sorry I can’t put a link, it’s too dirty, but put the words Jimmy Kimmel and Ben Affleck in YouTube, and you’ll find out!
My second favorite part was Tilda Swinton saying her Oscar’s butt resembles her agent’s butt in her acceptance speech. Although how does she know what her agent’s butt looks like? (I’m hoping she meant in pants.) Also the stuff she said about George Clooney. She’s hilarious!
My third favorite part was when Jon Stewart let winner for Best Song (with her boyfriend) Marketa Irglova from the movie “Once” come out and make her speech after the orchestra cut her off. Her speech was:
“Hi, everyone. I just want to thank you so much. This is such a big deal, not only for us, but for all other independent musicians and artists that spend most of their time struggling.
This – the fact that we’re standing here tonight, the fact that we’re able to hold this – it’s just to prove, no matter how far out your dreams are, it’s possible.
And, you know, fair play to those who dare to dream and don’t give up.
And this song was written from a perspective of hope and hope, at the end of the day, connects us all, no matter how different we are.”
Diablo Cody won the Oscar for Best Original Screenplay for JUNO.
Those are the highlights for you! Five hours, boiled down to one page. Carry on!