Meg’s Out Box
*Dear Keira Knightley,
Okay, so I'm really sorry I said all that mean stuff about you in my blog a few entries ago. I didn't know you were cool, okay? I DIDN'T KNOW.
Then I read that article about you in last month's ELLE or whatever it was, and you said you're a feminist and PRIDE AND PREJUDICE is your favorite book, and I realized you will totally make a FANTASTIC Elizabeth Bennett, and it isn't your fault about the bangs. So I just wanted to tell you that.
Also I'm sorry for the thing Lilly says about you in PRINCESS DIARIES 7 (that you are too beautiful to live). Often my characters express opinions which are not, in fact, my own. For instance, unlike my character Samantha Madison, I love the show FRIENDS (well, I did up until the last couple of seasons when it started to suck).
Anyway, I just wanted to let you know that, and, um, keep up the good work. I am totally going to go see DOMINO, it looks great.
*Dear Gwen Stefani,
Okay, so I'm really worried about you. Did you have a fever or something when you did that interview for this month's ALLURE, the one where you said you aren't a feminist?
I know there's been a trend lately where female musicians deny being a feminist—both Bjork and PJ Harvey denied being feminists in BUST magazine, for instance.
But I really thought you, Gwen, were above all that. Don't you know that all feminism means is that you believe in equal social, political, and economic rights for women? It doesn't mean you think women are better than men. It just means you think they are EQUAL to men, and deserve the same rights.
To give you credit, you DID tell the reporter that you needed to know what her definition of feminism was before you would answer her question (which you then didn't do). I have provided, above, the dictionary definition of feminism. As you can see, that definition doesn't say anything about how feminists can't wear cute clothes or makeup and still call themselves feminists, because, um, duh, we totally can. And many of us do.
So please get back to me at your earliest opportunity with your answer—are you a feminist? Or are you not? Because if you say you're not, I'm going to have to stop buying your records, as I've stopped buying Bjork's and PJ's, because I would rather support female artists who DO believe in equal social, political, and economic rights for women.
*Dear Jill Sobule,
I love your new album, UNDERDOG VICTORIOUS! I also love how that one time when I emailed you to tell you how much your song WHEN MY SHIP COMES IN meant to me, you wrote back. Everyone should get your new CD and go to your website to read your blog, which is hilarious.
*Dear Robert B Parker,
Hi. I loved SCHOOL DAYS. Spenser rocks my world. Thank you.
*Dear People Who Are Making the Show INVASION,
SO COOL!!! I LOVE IT!!!! I haven't seen the whole thing yet because I had to go out, but ROCK AND ROLL!!!! I love how you got all those stars who look like they're famous—like those Jack Black and Christopher Walken lookalikes—but aren't. And EBEs!!!! YES!!!!
*Dear Real World Kids Who Are Currently in Key West Filming Real World 17,
Dudes. Seriously. You're embarrassing yourselves. Every time I see you, you're either barfing out of the side of a cab (kudos to you for taking cabs, though, since you aren't actually living in Key West since the producers couldn't find a house here big enough to fit all of you and your film crew and instead they had to get a house in Key Haven next door to Ed Swift, the guy who owns the Conch Train, and who says your lights and loud partying are keeping him up), or staggering around on Duval. Your camera people are starting to look bored with it all.
Also, please ask your helicopter to stop buzzing my house while shooting exteriors.
*Dear All the People Who Keep Writing to Me to Say They Will Never Buy Another One of My Books Again Because of What My Heroine Does in READY OR NOT,
That's okay. I realize that my goal–to keep as many of my readers alive (and child-free, since teenage moms don't have a lot of disposable income to buy books) as possible–may not jibe with the goals of some parents and religious leaders, who seem to prefer that their children receive inaccurate and faulty information from government-sponsored abstinence only programs.
Which does sort of boggle my mind. I mean, if I had parishioners (and kids), my goal would be to give them all the information I could to keep them healthy.
But, you know. That's just me. I'm a little crazy that way!
But, hey, don't worry if you haven't come around to my way of thinking yet…I know of some books you can read instead of mine in the meantime: LEFT BEHIND! You can find them in the REAL LIFE TEEN section of your local chain bookstore. Because stories about teens running from the Apocalypse are so much more REAL LIFE than stories about teens having monogamous sex, safely.
The Big Meg Cabot Book Grab Giveaway is over. All of the books have been mailed out. They went library rate so if you haven't received yours yet, that's probably why. Library rate only costs like $4, but it takes 9,000,000 years for the books to get there.
Also, there were like 1200 of you and only like 500 books, so some of you won't be getting books this time around. But those of you who will be getting books should be getting them this week or next, or possibly the week after that.
And please, no need to thank me, my empty closet is thanks enough.
That's it for now! Keep that mail coming!