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Meg's Blog

MAIL BAG

Hi! I'm back from San Antonio, which, in case you didn't know, is the home of the Alamo. San Antonio is really pretty. My hotel was located on this thing called the Riverwalk, which is like this river you can walk along the side of, past all these pretty restaurants and cafes.

And they have water taxis. Like in Venice. It's cool.

This week, basically the whole town of San Antonio was taken over by reading teachers and librarians for the International Reading Association convention, at which I spoke. After I spoke, I walked back down to my hotel via the Riverwalk, and all these people I had never met before were like, “Hi, Meg!” because they'd seen me speak. It was really fun. Reading teachers and librarians rock.

I also had a lovely signing at Borders. Thanks very much to Mary and the rest of the stellar staff there, as well as reader Nevada, who came to my signing all the way from Hawaii, and who brought me cute products from there. Thanks also to Cassandra for the Don't Mess With Texas t-shirt, currently the only clean item of clothing I own. And hi to Hannah in Corpus Christi, who missed the whole thing. See you next time!

It's been a while since I answered any reader mail, so I thought I'd try replying to some here in the blog, since I get so many emails per day, it is impossible to answer them all individually and still meet my book deadlines. So, without further ado, here we go:

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Meg, when is Mia going to grow breasts? I mean, she is fifteen. She should have them by now.
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Okay, this is the last time I am answering this one, and I don't care if it's a spoiler. The answer is NEVER, okay? MIA WILL NEVER GET BREASTS.

Why? Because I DO NOT KNOW WHAT HAVING BREASTS IS LIKE. I cannot write realistically about something I have never experienced (aside from the princess thing, the ghost thing, the ESP thing, the saving the President thing, and the showing a hot movie star around my school thing). Not all of us hit our teens and magically morph into a 34C. Some of us are in our thirties and are STILL WAITING.

But guess what? We have managed to function PERFECTLY well, in spite of efforts of men, the media, and some of our more well-endowed sisters to make us feel like biological freaks. Some of us have even managed to attract romantic partners! And without the use of cleavage!

I am really getting tired of flat-chested girl persecution. IT MUST END!!! You, yes, YOU, can make a difference. Join me in singing the flat-chested girl's anthem, Deirdre Flint's “The Boob Fairy Never Came For Me,” from her CD, THE SHUFFLEBOARD QUEENS, available on iTunes and wherever cool CDs are sold.

Because while it is true that the boob fairy never came for me, I have managed to live a pretty fulfilling life, in spite of this tragedy.

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Dear Meg,
I play hockey, and your version of ICE PRINCESS, which you described in your last blog entry, where the heroine is a hockey player turned figure skater, sounds good! Could you possibly post it on your website, or maybe publish it someday as a book?

Sk8tergrrrl
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Dear Sk8tergrrrl,

Thanks, but I can't. That script belongs to Disney studios. I mean, they paid me for it. So I can't post or publish it. But thanks for your interest!

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MEG! WHAT IZ THIS I KEEP HEARING ABOUT A 1-800 #5 COMMIN OUT SOMETIME IN 2008????
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Actually, it will be coming out in December 2006/January 2007. Please don't ask me what it will be called or what it will be about because I haven't finished it yet. But yes, you will find out why Rob is on probation.

And in deference to the librarians and reading teachers I met this week, “iz” is spelled “IS” and “commin” is spelled “COMING.”

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Meg–we were your biggest fans before we read the sixth book. you totaly changed Michaels character. Geek bfs traditionally dont want to have sex. if they did no one wud date them. the reason geeks make the best bfs is becuz theres no sexual pressure. if u wanted to have sex you wud date some one who is hot.
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Where do you live? Because I need to go over to your house and speak to your mother IMMEDIATELY.

I really didn't think I was going to have to do this, but it's starting to sound like a lot of you girls need a little dose of reality, so here goes:

ALL BOYS (and, I would just like to add, most girls, once they reach a certain level of maturity) WANT TO HAVE SEX.

Yes. INCLUDING GEEKS.

Geeky boys, however, will (generally speaking—there are exceptions) not dump you if you don't sleep with them. They are often willing to wait.

But that doesn't mean they don't think about having sex! Approximately once every 60 seconds, if Psychology Today is to be believed (yes, I know. It must be tiring to be a boy).

Frankly, I don't think Michael's character changed AT ALL. He merely finally put into words what he has, apparently to the surprise of many of you, been thinking ALL ALONG (and he only mentioned it out loud because, if you will remember, Mia ASKED). Because this is what ALL BOYS HIS AGE (and many girls) THINK about:

Sex.

Believe me, I have this on certain authority from a variety of teenaged boys I know, many of whom are geeks.

There is nothing wrong with thinking about sex. There is nothing wrong with saying that you would like to have it someday, either.

What IS wrong is going around thinking that just because a boy is nice and isn't as “hot” as some other boys you might know, he “doesn't want to have sex,” because he is somehow sexless, and doesn't long for intimacy, which is, by the way, a basic need for ALL humans.

Yes, even for geeks.

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I was wondering if you could help me, I am doing a project about you and your princess diaries series. I need you to answer 20 questions by Friday or I will get an F!!!! Write back ASAP

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I am doing a school report on my favorite author. We had to choose and of course you were number one on my list. I am having trouble finding information on you if you would please e-mail me maybe a little about yourself it would really help.
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I need to know: How many siblings do you have and did you live with both of your parents as a child?Are you married or divorced and what are your likes and dislikes?Thanks,this would really help me with my author study.
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Okay, so I get approximately 50 of these PER DAY. I cannot possibly answer them all. I don't want you guys to get Fs on your reports. But seriously, it is NOT FAIR that you try to guilt me into helping you with claims that if I don't, you will flunk. If your report were on Charles Dickens, would you email him and tell him if he doesn't help you, you will flunk?

No, you would not. For one thing, because he is dead. Also he doesn't have email.

But also because I highly doubt your teacher intended you to email the author your report is supposed to be on, and ask him or her to do your research for you. Your teacher wants you to do YOUR OWN WORK. Otherwise, you won't learn anything.

So, I am sorry, but I cannot help you with your homework. I recommend GOOGLE. I have found out all sorts of stuff about myself just by putting the words MEG CABOT in an Internet search engine (many of these things I would have been happy NOT to know, but oh well).

Good luck. I hope you get an A.

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Dear Meggin,

No one would have to act like the coaster police if everyone would just use coasters.

And I think it's called a “bloomin' onion” not “onion blossom”. But I may b
e wrong, although I am apparently “technically a foodie”.

Sincerely,

–A member of the household who is not Henrietta
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!!!!! I can't believe he finally found my blog!!!!!

More later.

Much love,

Meg

PS Check out the June issue of Marie Claire for an article by me—hint: it's on the last page!

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