For those of you who haven’t grabbed a copy yet, you can find it just about anywhere, (except your local church), from your local bookstore to your local Target . . . . it’s even downloadable in Kindle and Nook format!

Some of you have written to say you’ve already read and enjoyed it (and even posted glowing reviews). Thanks so much for doing your part help to spread the truth about the upcoming vampire apocalypse!

Don’t forget, I’ll be kicking off my Overbite tour TONIGHT at the NYU Bookstore (just a hop, skip, and a jump from where I used to work in the 90s) at 6:30PM, on 726 Broadway!

And for those of you who can’t make it, don’t worry, because tomorrow night, I’ll be in New Jersey (yes, I know about the terrifying news broadcasts coming from New Jersey. But I’ll do anything to save you! And it will be worth it to see your shining, living faces!)

When:

Wednesday, July 6, 2011
7:00 PM

Where:

BOOKS AND GREETINGS
271 Livingston ST
Northvale, NJ 07647

Why:
Because it’s going to rock.

And if all goes well, on Thursday, I’ll see you in Nashville, TN!

Where:

NASHVILLE PUBLIC LIBRARY
Tennessee Humanities Council
615 Church St
Nashville, TN 37219

When:
Thursday, July 7, 2011
7:00PM

Then on Saturday, July 9, at 11AM, I’ll be taking a trip to NORA ROBERTS’ BOOKSTORE in Maryland (that will be LIVESTREAMED) followed by a live signing at noon!

TURN THE PAGE
Bookstore Café
18 N. Main St.
Boonsboro, MD
21713

(Contact: Janeen Solberg
 Main Phone: 301-432-4588 info@ttpbooks.com)

I’ll be making lots more stops all around the country after that. You can click here to see if I’ll be coming to a town near you to rescue you from the vampire hordes!

I’ve got LOTS more to say, but right now I’ve got to get my crucifix on if I’m going to get to my first signing on time and unscathed. Check out these amazing chapter excerpts and other extras in the meantime, and see YOU soon!

HAPPY OVERBITE RELEASE DAY!

More later.

Much love,

Meg

After my New York signings I took the train down to Maryland to visit my mom and her boyfriend (you might remember him as the teacher from The Princess Diaries. Yes, my mom and my teacher are now living together! How fun for meeeee)!

I used my time on the train (and the plane ride home) to never stop stabbing my eyes out answer some of the questions those of you who haven’t had a chance to attend any of the This is Teen signings yet have been Tweeting and Facebooking me! So, look for yours below (not all questions asked guaranteed answered. More to come):

Dear Meg: I kissed a boy in school, and now he is ignoring me. Also, he blocked me on MSN. What do I do?

Kisser

Dear Kisser,

Remember the nursery rhyme that goes, “Little Bo Beep lost her sheep and didn’t know where to find them”?

The advice given to Ms. Beep was, “Leave them alone, and they’ll come home, wagging their tails behind them.”

This advice also applies to boys you’ve kissed who are acting like buttholes.

Ignore him, and he will come home, wagging his tail behind him.

(But by that time you won’t want him anymore because you’ll have moved on to a new boy. But it’s good advice to keep in mind.)

Dear Meg: I don’t have time to read. Instead, I listen to books-on-tape in my car as I drive to and from my job. So, when will Abandon be available on audio tape?

Dear Audio Book Fan:

It’s out now!

“[The] strong, amusing voice, the plot twists, and the possibility of romance will draw mystery and chick-lit readers alike.”—Booklist on Abandon

You can buy or rent it here (along with tons of other of my books on tape)! Also available on iTunes (put Meg Cabot in Search).

Dear Meg: I got into the college of my dreams, but my parents say they won’t pay for it unless I major in something “practical” such as accounting. I want to be a writer like you. But my parents say if I want to major in creative writing, I can pay for college myself. I can’t afford to have $200,000 worth of loans to pay back when I graduate! My parents are crushing my dreams. What should I do?

Wants To Be A Writer

Dear Writer:

You’re lucky to have parents who love you so much that they want to make sure you learn a skill on which you’ll always be able to fall back to support yourself (in the extremely unlikely event the writing thing doesn’t take off right away).

So what if you’ll have to take some really boring classes? Guess what you get to do in the meantime? Work on your novel in the creative writing workshop you’ll be taking as an extracurricular!

You’ll already have an advantage over the kids majoring in creative writing, because you’ll have more hardship and adversity to write about (plus, you’ll know how to do your own taxes).

Be happy that you’re getting a free college education! Most people don’t have it nearly as good as you do.

Dear Meg, I love your new book covers! Do you get any input on their design?

Cover Fan

Dear Fan,

I’m very lucky because while I’ve always gotten input on the design of my covers, all the covers to my books have been super beautiful.

Like with my newest book, Abandon (for instance) since I was kind of obsessed with the myth of Hades and Persephone as a teen (Persephone was queen of the Underworld half the year, and goddess of Springtime the other half), I drew pictures from this myth constantly in my Algebra notebook. These later became the inspiration for a novel about a girl who dies, then comes back to life and has to start all over in a modern high school.

Of course when this book was about to be published, I emailed those drawings to my publisher and was all, “Make the cover look like this!!!”

When Scholastic was doing the cover shoot with the gorgeous model (yes: they did send me headshots, and yes, she is the girl I picked out), they sent me photos:

Abandon model shoot.

I totally couldn’t picture how the cover was going to look from that photo!

But when I saw the final cover design (which is so incredibly gorgeous) I was blown away:

For the cover of the new paperback of Insatiable (out June 7), it wasn’t so easy. I had NO idea at all for the cover. We went back and forth for ages!

I loved the cover for the hardback of Insatiable but when my mom saw it she asked, “What is it that she’s holding? What kind of books are you writing, now, anyway?”

I said, “OMG, that is a stake, Mother. People use them to kill vampires. What do you THINK it is?”

She said, “Well, I didn’t know. How am I supposed to know what people use to kill vampires?”

So that’s when I realized maybe we needed to go a different direction for the paperback.

Fortunately I had been sent tons of foreign editions of the book. Overseas publishers like to go with different looks for their covers, not necessarily what worked in the US. The cover for Size 14 Is Not Fat Either, Japanese edition, for instance, looks like this:

Well, hello, Heather Wells! Don’t you look fancy?*

*Two more Heather Wells books are coming next year!

Here’s Forever Princess (Princess Diaries 10), in Jakarta:

So cute!

Here’s the Brazilian version of a short story anthology I originally did in England (all the proceeds go to charity) with Louise Rennison and Cathy Clark:

So adorable!

And finally, a very scary (maybe TOO scary?) version of Insatiable!

This version of Insatiable from Italy is the one that really caught my eye, though:

She looks so beautiful, and yet so strong . . . like Little Red Riding Hood lost in the big city, but a Red Riding Hood who is carrying pepper spray. That’s kind of what I love about it!

When it came time to do the paperback version of Insatiable in the US, with a little revamping (ha, get it?), Italian Insatiable became US Insatiable, at my urging:

New Insatiable trade paperback cover

And the art department used their amazing powers to make the new Insatiable the basis for the cover of Overbite . . . .

Gorgeous, right?

Most importantly, Mom approves!

One last email (for now . . . He Who Shall Not Be Named in this Blog has dinner ready!):

Dear Meg: When will an ARC (advanced reader copy) of your July release Overbite be available? I can’t stand the wait!

Insatiable Fan

Dear Insatiable:

Sorry, there won’t be ARCs of Overbite! The contents of this book have been deemed TOP SECRET (by order of the Palatine Guard), and will only be unveiled on the release day . . . July 5 (although attendees of the literacy signing on June 28 at RWA in New York City might get copies earlier. But I don’t know for sure)! So everyone will find out on the SAME DAY what lies in store for Meena and her friends . . . and foes.

But . . . . here’s a little sneek peek of the summary of the new book! Enjoy!

Hungry for more?

This time, Meena may finally have bitten off more than she can chew.

More later.

Much love,

Meg

But that’s okay! Stories like Marilu’s and Angie’s have been told (and re-told) for thousands of years exactly because they inspire us and let us know we shouldn’t abandon all hope. Just when it seems like winter’s dark and gloomy days are going to go on forever . . . BOOM!

Not only do the flowers start blooming (a sure sign that spring is right around the corner), but authors start posting. . .Their New Official Book Trailers!

Here’s mine for Abandon:

Click here to view the embedded video.

No, despite popular speculation, that guy’s not an angel or a vampire or a ghost. Think about the clues. Dante’s Inferno. Abandon hope all ye who enter here. Death. Graveyards. Springtime . . . ringing a bell?

Maybe this outrageously awesome review from Forever Young Adult will help you figure it out.

The book won’t be in stores until April 26, 2011. That isn’t much time! I have a lot to do to get ready. My tour schedule is below, and these are just a FEW of the cities I’m going to be visiting.

What will I be doing while I’m at all these bookstores? Well, talking and signing copies of Abandon, answering questions about my other books, giving away tips on how to be a writer, handing out some cool Abandon-related prizes, and possibly spilling some spoilers about the next book in the series, just to name a few things:

MEG CABOT’S AMAZING ABANDON TOUR

Tuesday, April 26, 2011
6:00 PM
Davis-Kidd Booksellers
387 Perkins Road Extended
Memphis, TN 38117
901-683-9801

Wednesday, April 27, 2011
7:00 PM
Barnes & Noble
1430 Plaza Place
Southlake, TX 76092
817-442-0207

Thursday, April 28, 2011
7:00 PM
Barnes & Noble
Mansell Crossings Shopping Center
Alpharetta, GA 30022
770-993-8340

Friday, April 29, 2011
Royal Wedding of Prince William and Kate Middleton.
Day of Royal Rest

Saturday, April 30, 2011
2:00 PM
Rainy Day Books
Unity Temple on the Plaza
707 W. 47th Street
Kansas City, MO 64112
(913) 384-3126

Sunday, May 8-Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Orlando, Florida
Meg will be a featured author at the International Reading Association Convention. See author schedule. Convention events are open to IRA members only. A signing in a local bookstore in Orlando that will be open to the public may also be scheduled.

But wait! There’s more . . . Abandon events are also tentatively scheduled for Toronto, Boston, Miami, and other locations (to be announced soon)!

In the meantime, also look for me here:

Tuesday, June 28-Saturday, July 1, 2011
New York, New York
Meg will be attending the 31st Annual Conference of the Romance Writers of America and will emcee the 2011 Rita and Golden Hearts Award Ceremony. Click here for details.

Tuesday, June 28, 2011
5:30-7:30PM
The 2011 “Readers for Life” Literary Autographing
New York Marriott Marquis
Times Square
New York, NY
Open to the public. All proceeds go to charities that promote literacy. Click here for details.

. . . as well as events scheduled for my Overbite tour (the sequel to Insatiable, scheduled for release July 1) in New York City, New Jersey, Nashville, Maryland, Edina, Cedar Rapids, St. Louis, Albuquerque, and Seattle.

A lot of you have been asking when the next Allie Finkle is coming out. Right now there are no new Allie Finkle books scheduled for release beyond the six books already published about her. Allie is enjoying a nice long summer break with her friends and family.

Stay tuned for new installments in the Heather Wells series (which should make the many, many readers from whom I receive daily inquiries about Heather very happy, and makes me very happy, too, since I missed her, too)!

And don’t forget:
Whenever you’re feeling blue — just like Kirstie Alley in Family Sins — you can always turn things around with a little bit of pluck and determination (well, I wouldn’t recommend doing it exactly like Kirstie did, since she beat her foster kids and ended up in jail . . . oh, sorry, spoilers).

But now that springtime is here (officially), you know hope is on its way!

(Official Spring Flowers from my garden!)

More later.

Much love,

Meg

It’s the birthday of novelist Meg Cabot, born in Bloomington, Indiana (1967). As a kid, she hated the heat in Indiana, so she spent all her time in the library because it had air-conditioning. She realized that she actually loved to read, and decided that when she grew up, she would either be a writer or illustrate comic books.

After college she moved to New York and discovered that being an illustrator or a writer was not easy. So she worked as the manager of a dorm at NYU. Then her father died, and that changed two things:

First, she decided that life was short and she might as well do what she wanted, so she sent a publisher one of the novels she had written for fun, and eventually she got it published. It was a historical romance called Where Roses Grow Wild (1998). Second, her mom started dating again. She dated one of Meg’s college professors, and Meg was upset by it even though she felt like she shouldn’t be, so she wrote a story about a teenage girl whose divorced mother starts dating the daughter’s algebra teacher.

The story didn’t have much of a plot, so Cabot added a twist — the girl finds out that her father is the prince of a small European country, and that she is his only heir, and she has to go learn to be a princess. Before Cabot even published her first novel, Disney optioned the book for a movie starring Julie Andrews and Anne Hathaway. In 2000, Meg Cabot published The Princess Diaries, and the film version came out in 2001. The Princess Diaries is a best-selling series, with 10 books in all.

It’s pretty cool when you can impress your mom ON your birthday. She was much more impressed by Garrison Keilor talking about her (she actually called ME to tell me about it) than she was when I told her that I am a birthday slut on Dlisted again this year. (In fact, she said, “What is Dlisted? Why would you want to be a slut? I do not think you are a slut. I don’t like that,” which I’m pretty sure Michael K would love to hear.)

I have no idea who took the photo above (it was sent to me by my friend Beth), but I LOVE it because for my birthday I had to work, so I kind of felt like that cat.

But I tried not to feel sorry for myself, because 99.9% of the population has to work on their birthday. Writers aren’t special. I like to celebrate my birthday by lounging around all day in my pajamas watching movies with either aliens or cowboys in them (how mad am I that Cowboys vs. Aliens is not coming out until this summer?). But fortunately I can do that when I am done with all the work I have due, so it’s not a big deal.

I have to say though, you all made me working on my birthday much more fun with all your happy birthday Tweets, Facebook postings, emails, cards, and messages. So thank you!!!!

In return, I offer you this, with something much more exciting (I hope) to come . . . when I finish it! Thanks again!!!! I love you all!

Click here to view the embedded video.

More later.

Much love,

Meg

. . . or those of us who have been naughty are going to be in bit trouble (which will be called the Day of Reckoning) . . .

Many people—such as myself—have been keeping a sharp eye out for signs of either event, and since 2011 dawned, things have been looking promising for a Rapture. I give you the following clues:

Sandra Bullock and Ryan Reynolds have been seen publicly together at numerous locations. Could they be dating? Outlook good for Rapture!

On the other hand, Kate Middleton and Prince William have said they don’t intend to have staff in their new home together (eek! Reckoning!) Early on in my marriage, I realized that my husband and I had widely divergent opinions on what “clean” meant. I think budgeting to have a third party do the tidying up can actually prevent a homicide. Note to British commonwealth: For the sake of the future of the world (and the monarchy), get Kate and William a housekeeper!

(Speaking of monarchies, today is Michael Moscovitz’s birthday! Yes, he’s the fictional boyfriend of Princess Mia Thermopolis, but he has a Facebook page. Say hi and give him a kiss!)

(The fact that so many people remembered this and Tweeted it: Sign of Rapture!)

Speaking of royalty, I would urge you to go see The King’s Speech (doing so will prevent the Reckoning: we need more good movies like this, and less bad movies! The fact that this movie is so good is definitely a sign that the Rapture is coming)!

This movie is the true story of Queen Elizabeth’s dad, “Bertie” (later called King George), who had a horrible stutter. My uncle Jack, on whom the character Uncle Jay from the Allie Finkle books is based, also had a stutter, so I understand and have deep sympathy for stutterers. I too had a speech impediment growing up, and spent many hours in Speech and Hearing class).

Bertie and his wife never thought his stutter would matter, because he wasn’t next in line to the throne, so he didn’t need to speak publicly. Bertie never thought he’d become king, much less have to give inspiring speeches to the public over the radio . . . especially as his country was being bombed by Hitler! Can you imagine?

But through a CRAZY series of events (that involve a very, very naughty American lady named Wallis Simpson), that’s exactly what happens!

Colin Firth plays Bertie, and Helena Bonham Carter plays his wife Elizabeth (Queen Elizabeth’s Mum). But in this movie, the Queen Mum is very young and pretty and spunky, and determined to help her husband overcome his stutter, even when he wants to give up.

This movie is a deliciously yummy, inspirational love story that I wanted to watch all over again as soon as it was finished! It’s partly Bertie and Elizabeth’s love, and partly the love of the man the Queen finally finds to help her husband, that makes this story such total Rapture!

One of the cutest couples in all of history!

Another sign of the Rapture:

The movie The Fighter, because of all the funny mean girls in it! I thought it would only be about boxing (which, let’s face it, I am not so into), and so I really didn’t want to see it. Certain parties FORCED me to see it.

But it’s really about families, and how they can bring you down, but they can also boost you up again. So it turned out not to really be about boxing at all (well, it is, but not really, sort of like how Friday Night Lights isn’t really about football).

And like The King’s Speech, The Fighter is a TRUE STORY! I loved it!

OMG look at the clothes Mark Wahlberg’s sisters wear in The Fighter! Rapture!

More Rapture:

Taylor Swift and Jake Gyllenhaal have broken up! This is good because now we’ll get more awesome new breakup songs!

Even more Rapture:

I made a mistake! I thought the new Mediator re-issue of Books 1 and 2 in the series was coming out next month, but it came out December 28! So it’s in stores everywhere NOW!

Rapture

But even though there is so much solid proof that the Rapture is on its way, I became slightly nervous the Reckoning might be upon us instead, because shortly after January 1, these DISGUSTING, STINKY mushrooms started growing all over my yard.

Not all mushrooms are cool, mushroom hunters.

I was POSITIVE judgment day was upon us, and I of course had not passed inspection. I have houseguests visiting right now, and every time they go out by the pool they start asking, “OMG WHAT IS THAT SMELL?”

These mushrooms are SO GROSS and stinky they can only come from Satan. When I dig them up (the ones I can find. Some remain elusive, growing under shrubs and bushes, and I cannot find them. But I can smell them), I have to encase them in a plastic ziplock bag and then throw them in a Dumpster far far away from my house, like behind the recycling plant, or the smell (like a crematorium) can still be smelt for MILES.

But then I realized that surely there had to be a rational explanation for the mushrooms other than the fact that a hellmouth had opened up in my backyard because I’d been so naughty, like Wallis Simpson (except I have NOT been dallying with any heirs to the throne, or Nazis!).

And sure enough, it was true! I found it on Wikipedia. These mushrooms are called Stinky Squids. They are members of the stinkhorn family and they can grow eight inches just a few hours. If you don’t believe me, watch this video of a member of the stinkhorn family do just that:

Click here to view the embedded video.

Their growing in my yard was NOT a sign of the Reckoning, because these mushrooms grow in mulch, and new mulch was just laid in my yard. To get rid of them, I just have to have the mulch removed.

So you see? There is a rational explanation (and solution for) everything.

Which is excellent, since I have to get everything pretty for when MEG RYAN AND JOHN COUGAR MELLENCAMP GET MARRIED!!!! The fact that they are dating is another sign the Rapture is on its way!

Because the most famous person from my hometown marrying the star of some of my favorite movies of all time just has to happen. It just HAS to!

2011 just might be the best year ever. Fingers crossed, people.

More later.

Much love,

Meg

I’m proud to live in a place that attracts so many middle-aged married couples from Des Moines who use the opportunity to fulfill their lifelong dream of walking proudly down the street dressed like this:

(I know your mom and dad told you that they were going on a cruise this week but I just saw them outside of CVS and this is what they were wearing and they said to say hi.)

But you know what? If that’s what turns people on, I fully support it, because it’s not hurting anyone and the money goes to such a good cause. And fortunately for them, what happens in Key West stays in Key West (except for everything captured on the assorted webcams around town).

There are no judgments here.

I said no judging!

The good news is that you don’t have to go all the way to NYC or Key West to have a good time. I met a lot of families who were having a blast in Austin last week (you can see some of them in this extremely cute video) at my events at the Texas Book Festival.

Super cute reader in Austin

For those of you who missed these signings, the nice girls at Forever YA filmed and posted parts of them on their site, including a sneak peak of the cover for my new book, Abandon!

This was just supposed to be a special treat for librarians who attended the Scholastic Librarian Preview last week (and of course attendees of the festival), but since the cover got picked up and posted by so many people online, we decided to give everyone a glimpse. This isn’t the final/final cover (it’s still being tweaked), but here’s the beautiful design and synopsis they’re working on for now.

(And if you haven’t signed up for the Meg Cabot e-newsletter, you might want to do so. In addition to this month’s contest offering free copies of Avalon High books and T-shirts in celebration of the release of the Avalon High Disney Channel movie on November 12, we’re going to be sharing some other pretty exciting news very soon!)

I got to meet some AMAZING authors as well as readers in Texas, including many involved in the Zombie vs. Unicorn event.

Unicorn, mounted (died of natural causes)

This event—which was billed as a “smackdown” (although the most violent thing that happened was a chair that got kicked over by very cool YA writer Matt de la Pena)—was hosted by the Texas Book Festival and was standing room only. I was sad I had to leave early due to what I then thought was ragweed allergies but which later turned out to be a vicious bacterial assault, no doubt given to me by a zombie. Antibiotics are clearing it up, thank God.

Meg’s publicist Charisse, YA authors Dana Reinhardt and Matt de la Pena, and Texas Book Festival organizer Clay! All photos guaranteed taken by cell camera . . . enhance!

The Z v. U event was a sort of debate between Zombie vs. Unicorn anthology editors Justine Larbalestier and Holly Black, who were helped out by Scott Westerfeld, and other fun authors such as Dana Reinhardt (who pointed out that Sarah Palin recently said Democrats live in Unicorn land, a quote the unicorn side of the debate took as a compliment), and Varian Johnson (who bravely stood on a chair to hold up “Horny,” the Unicorn’s mascot) and Beautiful Creatures authors, Kami Garcia and Margaret Stohl, along with many others!

Varian holding up Horny, with the help of Kami Garcia and Hidden Unknown Author

Meg, Margaret, and Kami

Also present was Chronicles of Vladimir Tod author Heather Brewer, co-contributor to the Fear: 13 Tales of Suspense and Horror anthology (in which I have a story, The Night Hunter. All proceeds from this anthology benefit Reading is Fundamental!), so it was exciting to finally get to meet her!

If you live in or near New York City, be sure to check out the all star Books of Wonder “Fear” event on October 28th featuring RL Stine and many of the other contributors to this book! I wish I was going to be there, because RL Stine + Fear + Halloween = Excellent.

I believe unicorns should be sparkly, which is why I wore this Betsy Johnson hoodie to the Z v. U event.

Later in the week, when I got to NYC, I attended an Author’s Guild event about trends in Children’s Publishing with the fabulous author Rachel Vail, Lisa Holton (Founder and CEO of Fourth Story Media),
Neal Porter (Editor and Founder of Neal Porter Books), and Rosemary Stimola (Literary Agent, President, Stimola Literary Studio). The audience asked a lot of questions about e-publishing. Some recent mainstream media reports claim no one is reading books and magazines made out of paper anymore, a clear falsehood probably spread by zombies.

It has been my observation that the mainstream media likes to sensationalize things. Let’s face it: Sensational sells!

(This is how the various Housewives franchises survive.)

But while we keep hearing (over and over again) about how bad things are everywhere (and I’m not denying that things are bad for some people, particularly Theresa of the New Jersey Housewives, and right now Camille on Beverly Hills), we all know tons of people that very good things are happening to. So why aren’t these people on the news (or have their own Housewives franchises)?

Because good is not “sensational” enough to boost ratings. I would know, because no one is offering me my own Housewives franchise could be less interested in reporting how my paper sales are doing just fine—even better than my e-sales! That doesn’t make a good story. Or the fact that while I personally prefer to read paper books (and magazines . . . you can’t smell the latest celebrity perfume sample on an e-reader), I’m married to someone who reads e-books. That is just boring to the producers of Bravo the mainstream media.

Maybe if he was a zombie and I were a unicorn, and we fought to the death, it would be more sensational.

But we are not going to do that.

You know what I think would make a good story instead? You. For reading more books (and magazines, and blogs, too) than ever before, in every format.

So thank you, readers. We may not seem sensational to the mainstream media . . . but you’re sensational to me!

And if you had your own show (or a webcam on you) I’d totally watch you.

More later.

Much love,

Meg

. . . and also to sneak in a visit my brother (yes, the cop) and my nieces and my mom (who is originally from Denver, and is flying in for the occasion) and her brother and sister and her kids and oh, my God, I just realized almost my entire family lives in Denver! It’s about time I went back for a visit.

I hope I’ll see YOU at one or two of my events there (or one of the many family barbecues I’ll be attending, or even one of my school visits)!

But if you can’t make any of those, DON’T WORRY: you can still join in the fun and support the Craig Hospital by clicking here and using this voucher (you can even forward it and/or the code number to your family and friends) at any Barnes and Noble in the country between now and September 24 (you can even use it for online purchases)!

Funds from this in-store book fair and the Kappa Book & Author Dinner provide scholarships to Craig Hospital patients for continuing education!

Denver’s Craig Rehabilitation Hospital is one of the finest rehabilitation and research hospitals for spinal cord injury and traumatic brain injury in the world. Every single person reading this knows someone who has (or is related to someone who has) suffered a brain or spinal cord injury . . . because you know me!

A little more than a decade ago, He Who Shall Not Be Named In This Blog’s sister was in her backyard with her two children and their father, Tom, when he miscalculated a dive and hit his head on the bottom of the shallow end of the pool (this is why we do not allow diving in our pool at my house, even on the deep end).

Although she was able to save her husband from drowning, there was nothing HWSHNBNITB’s sister could do keep Tom from becoming a quadriplegic, which he is still today, although thanks to a lot of rehab, Tom did regain some mobility in his arms, and was able to go back to work part-time.

That’s why supporting places like Craig is so important. They help patients who have suffered these kind of traumatic injuries learn to return home, and even to school, work, and regain independence.

That’s why I’m off trying to help the Kappas raise money for Craig graduates . . .

. . . and visit BOTH my nieces’ classes, as well my twin cousins, AND hang out with Mom and her sister and brother, and MAYBE convince my brother to take me to the police target range (for research!).

But in the meantime, I wanted to tell you about a few other things that are going on—things I almost forgot in all the craziness in getting my book done before I leave!

I’m flummoxed how this (my brother) . . .

. . . produced this (allegedly one of my nieces).

Not possible, surely? Why is there no food/dirt on her? Must investigate further.

First of all, did you know I have stories in not one, but TWO fantastic anthologies out THIS MONTH? I know, I didn’t either (you write these things and then forget about them and then a year later, they come out, and it’s like, “What? Oh, I forgot about that!”)

And if you buy them (or any of my books) before September 24, and do it at Barnes and Noble, and
use this voucher, you can help a Craig graduate! (I’m just saying.)

Not only that, but all the proceeds of THIS book (below) are also going to Reading is Fundamental (RIF), which is the nation’s largest and oldest literacy organization!

Fear: 13 Stories of Suspense and Horror is edited by none other than the king of Horror and Suspense himself, R.L. Stine, and my story, The Night Hunter, is about a young woman who works part-time in the mall, a job she—unlike her snobby co-worker—actually needs, because her mother has blown her college fund.

She tries to make the time at work pass more quickly by calling the local radio station and begging them to play “Night Hunter,” a song by a local band that’s about the mysterious—but hot—new vigilante in town. The Night Hunter allegedly dresses all in black leather and rides a motorcycle, stopping criminals—single-handedly—that the police can’t seem to catch themselves.

But is the Night Hunter even real? Who is he? No one knows.

The last thing our heroine expects is that she’s someone who’d ever need the Night Hunter’s services . . . let alone that he would ever bother to save someone like her . . . .

But that’s exactly what happens when she’s taken hostage during an armed robbery later that evening, while the mall is shutting down for the night.

Will the Night Hunter save her? Or will he, too, let her down, just like everyone else in her life?

Here’s a review of Fear: 13 Stories of Suspense and Horror from Kirkus:

Thirteen highly suspenseful short stories, well selected by none other than R. L. Stine, who contributes the first tale, have the power to attract and delight many stouthearted young readers. The man behind the Goosebumps and Fear Street megaseries enlists some of the best in the business, such as Meg Cabot and F. Paul Wilson, Walter Sorrells and James Rollins, who offer plenty of heart-throbbing supernatural horror, crime suspense, shockers and sometimes a mixture of all three. Babysitters may want to skip creepy “Jeepers Peepers” from Ryan Brown and a standout chiller from Jennifer Allison, “The Perfects,” both of which offer little hope for their victims. Alane Ferguson pens the chilling “Dragonfly Eyes,” which follows the feelings of a murdered girl as she strains to offer ghostly help to another endangered girl. Heather Brewer’s “Shadow Children” brings to life those monsters that children know really are there in the dark. The editor pitches the collection to either middle- or high-school audiences with inventive but still easily understood stories. It’s a winning set—there isn’t a dud in the bunch. Fast-paced, shuddery-scary fun. (Horror/short stories. 12 & up)

I have to tell you, I haven’t even gotten a copy of this book yet! So I haven’t read anyone else’s story yet. But I can’t wait!

Then get ready for:

Zombies Vs. Unicorns

Yes! You’ve been waiting for it, and it’s finally here! People have been talking about this one for a long time .

I have to admit, I never really got the controversy. I mean, I LOVED Max Brooks’ novel about the coming zombie apocalypse, World War Z (soon to be a movie with Brad Pitt.)

And I adored the remake of George A. Romero’s classic zombie flick The Crazies (Timothy Olyphant can’t be in enough movies or TV shows, in my opinion).

But I also always loved Tom Cruise and Mia Sara in the unicorn filled romance adventure Legend.

And who doesn’t haven’t a soft spot for Charlie The Unicorn ?

But if someone gave me the choice, a pet zombie or a pet unicorn, it really wouldn’t be much of a contest.

And I feel that in my contribution to this anthology, Princess Prettypants, I prove, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that zombies (as well as partying frat boys) are no match for my heroine, or the gift she receives for her 17th birthday . . . a gift which at first, I’ll admit, she’s a little disappointed by. She was hoping for a car.

But trust me, she soon changes her mind when trouble starts brewing, and she sees what happens when you make the mistake of judging a unicorn by its name.

Unicorn fan art by Hibbary! So beautiful.

In other news, while I was sitting around writing about guys on motorcycles and unicorns, Michele Jaffe’s friend (and mine too, now) Heather got a new law made in New York. In fact, she got a new law named for her daughter, Elle (Princess Elle, I like to call her, in my head).

I know. Some people write about unicorns. Some people get laws made. I try not to feel inadequate most days, but it’s hard.

To quote from The New York Times, who can put it more succinctly than I can:

A year ago September 23, Elle was on a scooter in a crosswalk on East 82nd Street when a driver in a Ford Bronco struck her as he backed down the street in pursuit of a parking spot. Elle suffered a serious stroke not long after she arrived at the emergency room with a fractured skull. She spent the next four months in the intensive care unit and ultimately endured 11 operations, with doctors warning her parents to prepare for the worst — that Elle would most likely never walk or talk, if she even survived.

The man who “nearly killed her in his quest for a parking spot walked away with nothing more than a ticket.”

This prompted Heather, Elle’s mom—who realized “if he had had a few drinks the authorities could prosecute; sober, this unsafest of drivers was safe from severe punishment—to channel her frustration toward the absurdity of the traffic laws.”

Two weeks ago, New York state Governor David A. Paterson signed a bill declaring that drivers who flout traffic laws and seriously injure pedestrians in the process can lose their license for six months or, if it is a repeat offense, one year.

This is now known as Elle’s Law .

Wow.

Elle started pre-kindergarten last week. Good job, Heather! And good healing, Elle!

So . . . like I said. Brain injuries (as well as spinal cord injuries) can happen to any of us at any time. YOU MIGHT EVEN KNOW SOMEONE THEY HAVE HAPPENED TO (or know someone who knows someone they have happened to).

So I’m EXTRA glad to be attending this benefit to raise money for Craig Hospital this week.

So PLEASE, if you buy Fear or Zombie vs. Unicorns or the newest Allie Finkle, Blast From The Past (I’m loving this review of it!), or any of my books (or anyone else’s) this month, do the princessy thing: Use this voucher, and buy from Barnes and Noble!

And don’t forget:

Join me at this signing!
When: Thursday, September 16, 11 AM-2PM
Where: Barnes and Noble at 14347 W. Colfax Avenue, Lakewood CO 80401

Then join me later for
The 21st Annual Kappa Book & Author Dinner to benefit Craig Hospital’s Harry R. Hahn, MD Alumni Scholarship Fund.
When: Thursday, September 16, 2010

5:45 PM: Patron Party
6:00 PM: Cash bar & Book sales
7:00 PM: Dinner
Where: Hyatt Regency Tech Center

7800 East Tufts Avenue
Denver, CO 80237
Telephone: 303.799.1234 for tickets
www.denverkappa.org


And in case you’re at Wendy’s and find yourself unsure how to prepare cold drinks here is how. I feel bad because I think earlier in the month I posted about how to prepare hot drinks, and I didn’t want to leave you hanging. Sorry!

More later.

Much love,

Meg

Anyway, I’ve spent the past two days with a salad bowl in my lap. I won’t give you the details, except to say the following: If you ever have the stomach flu, do NOT watch Danika starring Marisa Tomei or The Box starring Cameron Diaz. Neither of these movies are what I would consider flu worthy (unlike Baywatch episode eight of season eight, happily entitled Eel Nino, in which Mitch wrestles a 20 foot electric eel in a cave. Fast forward to 3:50 to see Hobie punch the eel in the head!)

David Hasselhoff says in his autobiography “Don’t Hassel The Hoff” that he didn’t feel the eel storyline was very realistic (electric eels are fresh-water fish, and cannot survive in salt water, which will damage their gills and cause their electricity-generating organs to uncontrollably discharge), but Baywatch producers told him this plot was based on a true situation in which an eel escaped from an aquarium and grew to huge lengths in the Malibu sewers.

So, to celebrate the official start of the Back to School Season (always signaled by my throwing up in a salad bowl), I have a couple of amazing events planned:

First, tomorrow I’m visiting the Arctic Sunrise! Yes, that’s right . . . Greenpeace is launching a three-month long expedition to the Gulf of Mexico, and they’ve invited me to come aboard and say hello (since Princess Mia Thermopolis, whom you might remember joined me in donating all of our author proceeds from our book Ransom My Heart to Greenpeace, is back at school and unavailable to make state visits at this time) on their stop here in port in Key West, where they’re picking up researchers!

The Artic Sunrise is 165-feet long and will house the expedition’s crew of Greenpeace workers and researchers during their trip as they try to figure out where all those millions of gallons of oil disappeared to!

Expect a full report soon!

The second event is a huge book signing and dinner in Denver, CO on September 16. The proceeds will benefit Craig Hospital’s Harry R. Hahn, MD Alumni Scholarship Fund. I’ll join be joining best-selling mystery author Martin Cruz Smith (I KNOW. Speaking of eels, that scene with the eels in his book Polar Star is like my favorite scene in a mystery EVER) and well-known Egyptologist Donald P. Ryan at Barnes & Noble West on September 16, beginning at 11 AM (the store is located at 14347 W. Colfax Avenue, Lakewood CO 80401).

Then join all three of us later that evening for the 21st Annual Kappa Book & Author Dinner, where we’ll be speaking and signing. MC for the evening will be from Channel NBC9. I know, it’s going to be so FANCY!

For more information on both the signing and how to get tickets for the dinner, click here. I’m very excited about this trip, not only because it’s for such a good cause but because half my family lives in Denver, and I’m going to see my brother and nieces and aunts and uncles and cousins’ and even be making a few SCHOOL VISITS! (Don’t you love that back-to-school smell? Have they figured out how to do something about that yet? My whole house smells like that now, on account of my flu.)

So to celebrate that (the events, not the smell of my house), as well as the release of the latest Allie Finkle adventure, Allie Finkle #6, Blast From The Past, due in stores September 1, I’ve decided to have an Allie Finkle Back to School Contest!

If you’re a teacher or a librarian stocking your classroom bookshelves for fall (or if you have a favorite teacher or librarian who is doing this!) be sure to enter! All you have to do is join my Facebook page, then post a story on there about your favorite teacher, explaining what made him or her so great (just like Allie Finkle’s favorite teacher, Mrs. Hunter).

(Edited to add: OK, I have already heard from a zillion teachers and librarians who don’t belong to, or know how to post something, on Facebook. If this is the case, you can still enter. Just follow the instructions below, and email me your story.)

Send your story to meg@megcabot.com, with the words Allie Finkle Back to School Contest in the subject line, along with the name of the teacher and the postal address of the school or library to which you’d like some books sent, as well as what age range you’d prefer (middle grade or YA. Also, we have some audio books, so if you’d like those, please let us know)!

Then in a week or so, a few dozen lucky winners will receive FREE Meg Cabot books in the mail for their classrooms or libraries . . . maybe even copies of my brand new September 1 release, Allie Finkle #6, BLAST FROM THE PAST, the newest book in the Allie Finkle series!

Remember, I can only send copies to schools or libraries at this time!*

And in a separate contest, just for book reviewers/bloggers:

Book reviewers with blogs interested in receiving an advanced reader copy of Allie Finkle #6, Blast From the Past, can email me at meg@megcabot.com. Be sure to include a link to your blog, as well as the address at which you receive packages, so we have a place to mail your book!*

(Advanced reader copies are uncorrected proofs, which means they may contain editorial mistakes. Therefore they are not appropriate for placement on bookshelves in classrooms or libraries.)

*We will make every endeavor to email you to let you know whether or not books are on their way, but this may require a level of organization not possible at this time. Copies should come by September 1 though if you’ve won!

Isn’t Back to School Time wonderful? Well . . . I guess that depends on who you ask, of course, as the comments on this, the most famous (and controversial) Back To School commercial of all time, indicate.

More later.

Much love,

Meg

If you hold a sparkler to a mannequin’s dress, it WILL catch on fire.

If you go away for the holiday weekend, some kids might make a really big water slide from the roof of your house.

But if you tell certain kids NOT to do something (like make a really big water slide from the roof of your house while you’re not home) all you’ll end up doing is making that kid even more obsessed with that thing than ever.

Like the mom who made me stop watching a certain vampire movie in the middle when I was 12:

Ever since then, I’ve had to watch anything with vampires in it, in a vain effort to find MY lost vampire movie … even movies I’ve had no interest in seeing, that I was sure weren’t my vampire movie, such as Nosferatu and The Hunger and Lair of the White Worm.

That’s how I’ve ended up seeing almost every vampire movie ever made, and also how I ended up guest blogging about the experience this week on USA Today’s Pop Candy. Read more about my vampire movie obsession here.

Oh, yeah:

And someone smuggled an actual copy of The Palatine Guard Human Resources Handbook (featured heavily in my new book, Insatiable) out of the Vatican, so we posted it on my site.

(Don’t ask me how they did it! We just post, we don’t question.)

If you want to know more about what it’s like to be one of the Chosen Few (if you don’t know what the Palatine Guard is yet, first of all, for shame. Second of all, click here), just visit the “Extras” page on the Insatiable homepage and then scroll down until you get to the Palatine Guard Human Resources Handbook (it’s disguised to look like an ordinary book. Obviously, we don’t want anyone from a certain place to know that we have this information. It’s explosive!).

Here are some random selections from The Palatine Guard Human Resources Handbook

Article 2 Combat Zone Protocols

2.1 Procedures In The Event of Mass Human Casualties


In the event of mass human casualties due to a supernatural-related event, the primary goal is to manage the situation in such a way that the civilian population (or the media) never suspects the true cause. Take stock of the situation and be prepared to provide explanations that match the scene: natural disasters, man-made disasters, or a combination of natural and man-made disasters often result in high loss of life. For example, a severe microburst in the middle of the summer could account for mangled bodies strewn across a suburban street. In cities like New York, thousands of people suffer cab-related fatalities each year. If a microburst were to hit Lower Manhattan at rush hour, the body count would be high.

Article 4
 Expenses and Equipment

4.3 Per Diem

Vampire Hunters will be extended a $50/day allowance for food and lodging. We have reciprocal agreements with various churches and convents in secure sites across the country where Level-1 staff can reserve rooms while on duty. Dining at exclusive restaurants and staying in expensive hotels is strictly prohibited. No exceptions.

Article 5 
Battlefield Protocol

5.2 After Capture

If you are captured by a vampire, every effort will be made to extract you alive. So be patient. While you are captive, you are not to reveal, even under torture, anything about the Palatine Guard or other Hunters. Your anti-torture and anti-exsanguination training should help you resist being interrogated by a vampire or other non-human creature. You should conduct yourself with honor and never forget that you are human. If you do not survive capture, every effort will be made to recover your body and give you a dignified burial.

5.3 If You Are Turned During Capture

Being turned while captive is one of the most undignified (un)deaths that a Hunter can endure (mostly because you will live for eternity knowing you allowed it to happen). To save yourself from this fate, it is vitally important to make every effort to terminate your own life before you become undead. The Hunter orientation that all new employees attend includes training in how to kill yourself quickly and painlessly. In the event that you fail in this and are turned during capture, your fellow Hunters will have to hunt you down and kill you (usually by removing your head). Please do not take this personally. As you know, this is policy. Struggling, begging for mercy, and/or attempting to kill colleagues who are only attempting to carry out their assignments will only make things more difficult in the long run for yourself and for your former friends, who must carry out an unsavory task.

5.4 Family Notification Order If You Are Killed or Turned


Your family will not be notified if you are killed or turned. They will only be told that you decided to take an extended vacation, and every month or so they will be sent a postcard from some distant, tropical destination until they forget about you. This is to protect them and other Hunters from non-human reprisal.

I told you! It’s explosive!

Many of you have sent in SASE’s (to me at Meg Cabot, P.O. Box 4904, Key West, FL 33041-4904) with requests for Insatiable bookmarks and Dracul tattoos, etc. We are happy to provide these. Sadly, however, we cannot provide you with copies of The Palatine Guard Human Resources Handbook. These are copyrighted to the You Know Where! We will be adding more to it online, however, when and if our “source” recovers more Palatine Guard Human Resources Handbook material. So keep checking back!

He Who Shall Not Be Named In This Blog’s dad thanks everyone who wrote in with get well wishes about his heart surgery. He’s in good spirits, and not just because no one has made a giant waterslide from the roof of his house. Yet. Keep up the speedy healing, Mr. HWSNBNITB, Sr!

I shall be spending my holiday weekend NOT making any giant water slides or lighting mannequins dresses on fire with sparklers. That’s because I just found out there are restaurants that employ monkeys as waiters. Not waiters who are as incompetent as monkeys, but ACTUAL monkeys.

I’m going to try to find one in my area, although I suspect I will probably have to go Japan for this, and this isn’t going to happen, as we all know what it’s like to travel during a holiday weekend.

Stay safe!

More later.

Much love,

Meg

PS Ugh, I know! A lot of you have written that you want to be writers and that you came here looking for writing tips! So where are they?

I recommend using the Search function to look through my older blog posts. You can also go here. I host a Writing Forum for FREE (I know. Huge. That’s how big my heart is).

I’ve been writing this blog for over six years, and during that time, I’ve posted many, many entries on the writing process, as well as the revision process, how to get published, how to find an agent, etc. I know they’ve been helpful, because I’ve received hundreds of letters, emails, and even whole published books from you, thanking me for helping you to get published, and crediting the information I’ve posted here for it. That makes my already HUGE heart feel even HUGER! At the end of this month, I’m going to Orlando Disneyworld Resort to share even MORE of my writing knowledge (and sign books for charity) at many events at the RWA National Conference. I hope I’ll see tons of you there!

I realize, though, that there are new readers coming to this blog all the time, eager to find out how they, too, can get published. All you have to do is look! The information is always here (actually some of it is also here, too)!

The best advice anyone ever gave to me, I’m now passing on to you: Just take it one page at a time.

XXXOOO

M

At the shower people told me they had just seen John Searles from Cosmopolitan hosting the “Summer Reads Round-Up” on NBC TV’s Weekend TODAY (Hoda and Kathy Lee aren’t on it. They have weekends off).

One of the five books John Searles chose, it turned out, was mine.

I was all, “WHAT?”

Everyone was like, “Meg, I didn’t know you had a new book out.”

I yelled, “I don’t. Until June 8.”

(But, as I cannily informed them, you can pre-order it.)

Since I didn’t even know it was going to be on, I didn’t record the show, and there’s no link up yet.

But my publisher sent me a transcript. Out of context, the script is hilarious, so I’m pasting it here:

ROBACH: OK. I think the next one kind of says it all in the title. “Insatiable.”

Mr. SEARLES: “Insatiable.” Meg Cabot is known primarily for her young adult novels like “Princess Diaries,” that series. This time she tries something different, and succeeds wildly. It’s about a woman who has this weird ability to be able to tell how someone’s going to die. It makes for a great read.

ROBACH: Oh.

Mr. SEARLES: I don’t want to have her at a dinner party of mine anytime soon, but it’s a great book.

It kind of sounds like he’s talking about how he wouldn’t want to have ME at a dinner party, but I think he means my main character (who looks like Kate Spade Barbie, only not as skinny and with a pixie cut).

Yes, the dog is the dog from the book, Jack Bauer.

You can see Kate Spade Barbie star in her own video, if you scroll down a bit. But first:

Some of the people at the baby shower were like, “Uh, Meg, I didn’t know you knew anything about vampires.”

I believe they regretted asking this question when I spent the rest of the shower informing them of the following:

A Few of My Favorite Vampires/Vampire Slayers

Sarah Michelle Gellar as Buffy on Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV)

Following in the footsteps of the first feminist vampire slayer (Mina Harker), Buffy, the Chosen One, had the misfortune to fall in love with not one, but two vampires!

I love her creator Joss Whedon and how he ”weighed in on the vampire craze of the late 00’s” in this week’s Entertainment Weekly (100 of the Greatest Characters of the Past 20 Years, although I thought they left out a few).

But I have to disagree with the term “vampire craze of the late 00’s.” True, as storytellers, our job is to put our own spin on the topic (Joss’s? “Growing up.” Mine? “Being dead? Not a happy ending.”)

But this “craze” is no craze. You want a craze?

Check this out:

Brad Pitt as Louis in Interview with the Vampire (1994)

FACT:

1994. I was working as an assistant dorm manager at NYU when Interview with the Vampire exploded in popularity (kind of like Twilight, only way darker).

A bunch of suitemates in a room in the dorm where I worked decided it would be cool to bite one another, then drink each other’s blood.

If you decide you want to be a real life vampire, that’s cool with me. Just don’t do it if you have hepatitis from all your unsafe piercings/tattoos.

So, as far as crazes go, I consider this current one pretty mild. I mean, you’re embarrassed because your mom threw her thong at Taylor Lautner?

Hey, I was riding around in ambulances with people to St. Vincents, then changing locks (under command of the NYC Board of Health), and handing kids their belongings in plastic Glad bags (not without a certain amount of glee. I mean, these kids were dumbasses).

So go read about the history of vampire novel crazes here.

Then come back and read this:

Vampirism. Fun to read about. Just don’t try it at home (or at school).

And don’t call it a craze until the NYC Board of Health comes and shuts it down, punks.

David Boreanaz as Angel on Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV)

The gypsy curse that gave him back his soul (but decreed if he experienced a moment of pure happiness) caused him much inner pain. Because of course for him happiness was sex with Buffy. But it was so much fun for us viewers.

James Marsters as Spike in Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV)

A vampire who never had his soul restored by a gypsy curse, Spike somehow managed to love Buffy anyway. He loved her so much he went and managed to get his soul restored on his own (through a long and painful process), just because he thought Buffy might forgive him for his many misdeeds.

Why didn’t Angel think of this? Did Spike love Buffy more than Angel did? Why do I still think so much about this guy?

Wesley Snipes as Blade in Blade (1998)

In a time when darkness rules the land, one man will come forth and lead us to the light. That time is now, and that man will be Wesley Snipes.

Where are you, Mr. Snipes? Come save us.

James Woods in John Carpenter’s Vampires (1985)

Like From Dusk Till Dawn, starring George Clooney as a psychotic escaped con who kidnaps Harvey Keitel and takes him and his kids to a bar overrun by vampires, John Carpenter’s Vampires is just always ON. Why? I don’t know. I have to watch it whenever it is. Because like 30 Days of Nights, it’s just scarily awesome.

Salem’s Lot by Stephen King

Wait, what? Isn’t this supposed to be a list of movies and TV shows? No, it includes books, too. I’ve never gotten to the end of this book because it scares me so much, so I don’t know what happens. DON’T TELL ME!

Stephen Moyer as Bill Compton in True Blood (TV)

God, look how cute they are! And they love each other in real life, too! I don’t want to say I knew from watching the show, but couldn’t you tell? I could.

I’ve never met Charlaine Harris, but I want to, especially after this interview in the NYTimes magazine.

Keifer Sutherland as David in The Lost Boys (1987)

All I’m saying is, this is the movie where he trained for all the torture scenes he’d do later in 24.

Parker Posey as Danica Talos in Blade: Trinity (2004)

New rule: Parker Posey must be in all vampire movies.

Frank Langella in John Badham’s Dracula (1979)

The original sexy rich vampire (on film) who only liked virgins.

That table kind of reminds me of the one the hot devil guy had in the movie Legend (when he tried to make Tom Cruise’s girlfriend be his hot devil bride). Aw, Legend!

Kate Beckinsale in Underworld, many incarnations (2003-2011)

If you liked her as an orphan tidying up Cold Comfort Farm, you’ll LOVE her as Selene, the tortured vampire.

Well, maybe you won’t, but I did.

Ashley Greene as Alice Cullen in Twilight (2008)

I just love Alice, who wins my award for best dressed vampire of all time. My favorite part in New Moon was the head scarf she wore while driving in Italy. Did she go, “Let’s see: Driving fast to stop Edward from killing himself? Ooooh, chiffon head scarf. Perfect!” Yes. She did. (This was a refreshing change after Bella literally did not change clothes for three months while sitting in that chair in a depressed stupor.)

Dracula by Bram Stoker

Join us. We’re waiting. We don’t bite.

You know you want it.

Ryan Reynolds as vampire Hannibal King in Blade: Trinity (2004)

This is just horrible. Ryan Reynolds is a gifted thespian and has given us hours of viewing pleasure, particularly in comedies such as Just Friends and The Proposal.

We should not be objectifying him by posting shirtless photos of him all over the place, particularly as Hannibal in Blade: Trinity, which he may not consider his finest work (or maybe he does. I don’t know).

Please, please vote for Ryan and Sandra to win Best Kiss at this week’s MTV Movie Awards (hosted by one of my favorite comedians, Aziz Ansari. Aziz wants you to vote for Ryan)!

Save Ryan, Jessica! Save him from everyone preying upon his manly gifts!

I’ll close with this exclusive video sneak peek from my book, re-enacted by Barbie, GI Joe, and Ken (this is the Ken doll that was auctioned off, along with an ARC of the book, for $600 to benefit Do The Write Thing For Nashville!):

Note: No dolls were objectified in the making of this book trailer.

More later.

Much love,

Meg