RUMOR CONTROLJanuary 30th, 2006
So there have been a lot of rumors flying around about me lately, and I would like to take this opportunity to correct them here and now.
Is it true Drake Bell is going to star as David in the movie of “All-American Girl”?
No, because there is not going to be a movie of “All-American Girl”. I currently hold the film rights. The way I can tell that I currently hold the film rights is that no one has paid me for them. I would know if someone had paid me for them, because there would be a lot more money in my bank account that there currently is.
But on www.imdb.com (Internet Movie Database) they say Raven and Drake are in the movie and that it is “in production.”
I love www.imdb.com. I go there almost daily to look up some movie or actress. But imdb.com makes mistakes, and this is one of them. I just checked my bank account, and there's still no money from a movie studio in it, which proves to me that “All-American Girl” is not “in production”. Besides which, Drake Bell HIMSELF has told his fans that this is a rumor. Everyone should leave poor Drake alone, he was just in a horrible car crash and needs his rest (I learned this on www.imdb.com)
Is it true there's going to be a sequel to AVALON HIGH?
It's true that I have said that if I think of one, there will be. But I have not thought of one.
Is it true there is going to be a 7th Mediator?
No. As I have stated before, I am happy where Suze ended up at the end of Book 6, and I don't want to do anything to jeopardize that. She and I both need a rest.
Is it true that there are only going to be 12 installments of the Princess Diaries books?
Yes. There will only be 12 full-length novels about Mia's life. Book 7 comes out this Spring, and I am working on 8 now. That leaves four more after that. So start mentally preparing yourselves for the big finish, which will take place the last semester of Mia's senior year in high school.
Is it true that lately a lot of people from your past have been contacting you wanting to make amends for things they supposedly did to you twenty years ago?
Yes, this is true. I suspect it is because many of them are turning 40 or having children of their own, and are reflecting on their lives. Also because I am easy to find because of this website.
Is it true that the other night, after one of these “making amends phone calls,” you looked up your old journal from 1983, and was so horrified by what you'd written in there that you shredded it in the paper shredder in your office?
Yes. In the spirit of the recent Make-Amends-To-Meg trend, I too would like to take this opportunity to formerly apologize to anyone who knew me in 1983, when I was 16, when I made Lindsay-in-the-Ladies-with-a-Sharpie look like Mother Theresa. I had to destroy the journal in the event I ever die in an untimely manner and my mother and/or any guy I dated during that time might happen to read it.
Is it true in 1983 you made out with a guy who wasn't your boyfriend in a stairwell of the Bloomington, Indiana Third Street Parking Garage?
And that you did it behind your boyfriend's back?
And behind the back of the other guy you were dating behind your boyfriend's back?
I ALREADY TOLD YOU 1983 WAS A VERY BAD YEAR.
This is a two-fold question: Is it true you're going to write a book about that experience, and, if so, how are you going to make it seem realistic when you have shredded all your journal entries about it?
I am going to do whatever I have to do in order to make amends to anyone whom I might have injured in 1983. It is possible that this book will be called TOMMY SULLIVAN IS A FREAK. To people who knew me in 1983, I am sorry. That was a very bad year for me. This apology extends to my husband, whom I also met in 1983, and to whom, when he famously asked me “why a high school girl was at a college party,” and suggested that I “should go home and babysit someone or something” I replied: “If we were cops and you were my partner, I would shoot you in the back,” a fact he has never yet let me forget. Like I said, 1983 was a very bad year for me, and I apologize (although if you had told me in 1983 that by 1993 I would be MARRIED to that rude guy from the college party, I'd have shot MYSELF).
Rumor # 12:
Isn't it true that you yourself are turning 40 on February 1 of this year?
NO!!! NO THAT IS NOT TRUE!!!! I AM TURNING 39!!! I was born in 1967. It's true, you can look it up on www.imdb.com.
But you said sometimes www.imdb.com lies.
Not about that!! THAT PART IS TRUE!!!! 2006-1967=39!!!! DO THE MATH!!!!
That is all the rumor control I can take for the moment. I have to go shred some more of my—I mean work on my novel. Bye!