ART SHOW

January 11th, 2006

Yes!!!! It's The First Official Meg Cabot Art Show!!!! All art 100% by Meg Cabot!!!!

As some of you might know, when I was little I wanted to be a veterinarian when I grew up, but failing that (which I did, by getting a 410—out of 800–on my Math SATs), I wanted to be an illustrator.

So I used to practice drawing ALL THE TIME. It was my primary activity, and eventually I majored in studio art in college and even enjoyed a VERY brief career as a freelance illustrator.

But the drawings I'm posting below for the First Official Meg Cabot Art Show aren't from my professional career. They are from my youth, specifically, drawings I did from ages 12-16 (before I learned, as Sam does in ALL AMERICAN GIRL, to draw what I see, not what I know).

I hope you will enjoy this peek into what I now see was a period of my life when I was actively psychotic and ought to have been in a home for disturbed youths.


Here is a picture I remember thinking it was VERY IMPORTANT to stay up all night to draw when I was 12. It is a portrait of Eilonwy from the “Prydain Chronicles” by Lloyd Alexander. Note that Eilonwy is much sexier than we were led to believe by the books.
–Medium: Magic Marker, pen, spit (I was very into spitting on my drawings to establish a watercolor effect, and was much too lazy actually to get up and get a GLASS of water, or do them in watercolors. Also if you spit on Magic Markers, they last longer. Duh).


I am not at all sure what this is supposed to be, although clearly she's a princess. I was very into princesses/fairy tales/fantasy when I was 12-16. This is clearly an illustration from something, but I have no idea what. Note that the girl went to bed naked. I'm sure I never showed this to my mom.
–Medium: Some kind of paint I was forced to use because it was non-toxic (after it was discovered I was putting Magic Markers in my mouth to make them last longer)


This is an illustration from a Norwegian fairy tale I read when I was 14, about a prince who is under a spell that turns him into a snake at night. Look how cranky the princess looks. She's all, “Not tonight, Snake Boy! I have a headache.”
–Medium: Pastels, and of course spit


Here's another princess. My, isn't she busty! I know what I was thinking when I drew that: “Boob Fairy, please come to my house tonight. I swear I've been good!”
–Medium: Colored pencil, spit


Eventually I moved on from princesses to mermaids. Who doesn't?
–Medium: This actually looks like crayon, which is strange because you can't spit on crayon, the spit just pools over the wax.


Mermaids were good because you didn't have to bother with a shirt, you could just go straight to the boobs, which never did succeed in luring the Boob Fairy to my house, but oh well. The nice thing about living underwater is that you never need a boob lift, they always look perky no matter what size they are.
–Medium: Crayon, again

Sometimes I drew normal girls, like this:

–Medium: Colored pencils, spit

And this:

–Medium: Colored pencils, spit

Well, okay. Maybe they weren't THAT normal.

I would like to point out that all of these drawings were done in front of the television. Even as a teen as I was a workaholic, and liked to multi-task. So I would watch Dukes of Hazard and Fantasy Island while I drew mermaids and princesses.

Another thing I liked to do when there was nothing else to draw was pretend like someone had hired me to illustrate their book. Here is a pictorial tribute to Beauty and the Beast that I did over one summer break. It is mostly in pencil, except where otherwise specified.


Here is Beauty. Isn't she hot? My hair would never do that. So I gave her the hair I wanted. I guess that makes her my Mary Sue.
Check out that broom. That is a broom drawn by someone who has never actually used one.


Here's Beauty with her mean sisters. In the original (ie not Disney) version of this story, Beauty has crappy sisters who make her do all the housework, a la Cinderella. Beauty's family used to be rich, but now they have fallen on Hard Times. Note the patches on their lustrous gowns. I particularly like the plaid next to the ermine.


I can't draw men, so I obviously just skipped the whole part where Beauty's dad steals the rose and gets in trouble with the Beast. I guess I figured the readers would catch up. Instead I went straight to the Beauty Going to the Castle part.
Check out that horse. Man. I used to be considered good at drawing horses, too. That is just sad.


Of course when Beauty gets to the castle, she gets all new clothes. This is the Most Important Part of the Whole Story. Obviously. I had big plans that there would be Beauty and the Beast paper dolls based on this section of the book. Even at the age of 15, I was all about Selling Out and Retaining Merchandising Rights.


YEAH! NEW CLOTHES! Maybe there could be a Beauty Barbie! Little girls all over the world could dress and undress her and then cut her hair into an unattractive bob in a moment of tragedy they would regret forever after, like I did to my first Barbie.


Everything is going fine in the fancy castle, until….


…Beauty looks behind her….


…And there's the Beast!

Okay, whatever, I told you I can't draw men. And I certainly can't draw Beasts. So I just put a big hood over his head. It's sort of believable that he would be wearing a hood, because he's so ashamed to show his grotesqueness to her. Right? RIGHT????

I would like to point out that when I drew these, I didn't have cable, a VCR, or the Internet, so how was I supposed to know that guys in hoods are Creepy, and Not in a Good Way? I mean, we didn't even have MTV until I was in college, practically.


It doesn't matter anyway because after a few cocktails they start getting along fine. The obvious question here is, how is he drinking that champagne? Through the hood? Under it? It is a mystery for the ages. And what are they talking about?

Beast: “So, what did you do today?”

Beauty: “Oh, I tried on a million dresses. You?”

Beast: “Oh, I eviscerated a couple of stags.”


But who cares, since they're so into each other? Enough to go dancing, even. And as long as he's got a mask, why shouldn't she? I'm not sure what that orange background is about, or what the jelly-like substance is
all over Beauty. Most likely, it's jelly. Probably grape.


Everything is going along fine until Beauty gets it into her head that she's going to check out what's under the mask while the Beast is sleeping. I can see I did this in non-toxic paint. That's a dog on his bed, not a rat, by the way. That's the same kind of dog the guy I had a crush on at the time had (miniature Italian greyhound—and no he didn't get teased about his rat dog AT ALL, especially in Southern Indiana) so you so know what I was subconsciously thinking here.

I know! Don't tell my mom!

But we will never know what happened next because that's when school started again and the guy I had crush on finally asked me out, so I had no time to draw stuff anymore, because we were too busy making out during “Wargames” (featuring my 80s Teen Film Heroine Doppelganger, Ally Sheedy, who actually drinks a TaB in the movie) and all. Sorry!

That's it for now. I hope you enjoyed the show. Tune in next time for even more art, specifically, ART I CREATED IN CLASS WHEN I SHOULD HAVE BEEN TAKING NOTES, or WHY I FLUNKED ALGEBRA. TWICE.

Here is a sneak peek:

You so know you want to come back for second helpings of THAT.

More later.

Much love,

Meg